What you do to me!?

You make me lose my sense to the point that I can't think anymore! I want to give it all up for you, let go of my fears and bring down the wall that I hide behind! The problem is I didn't even have a boubt well actually I don't think I have a doubt! You didn't have to fight to break through the wall. It just came tumbling down for you. I didn't even try to stop you and that really scares me! I don't get butterflies, my stomache doesn't do flips and my heart doesn't race or skip beats but I just can't resist callinf or texting you. I have you on speed dial and all I want to do is talk to you. I don't know how it feels to be in love but I do know what it feels like to have a crush. I've had the love feeling explained to me and it's not how I feel, it doesn't feel like a crush either. I don't know what it is about you that has me willing to throw it all away, hell we hardly talk! But god knows I want to I want to spend the whole say with you just taking, you make me so happy and make me laugh really hard, damn you're funny. Gosh!! It's like the saying "You got me under your spell" well  guess this is the case to which the saying is perfectly applied, I am under your spell. I really want something to happen bas I'm scared of my reaction when it does, I know myself I'm going to say I'm not ready and push you away. You see I have this picture of MY Mr. Right he's the one that will hold me, shake me and say "You listen to me! I love you and I think you're the one! I don't care what you say You're ready w '3a9ban 3alaich cause I'm not going anywehre!". Then I'll know he's the one, the one who's not going to take no for an answer, the one who knows me and my cynical, bitter, put on a strong front and scare the guy away attitude, the one who will see past through all that bullshit and sees that I'm just scared and looking for saftey, the one who'll make sure I know that he loves me and is never going to hurt me. I don't knw if that's you or I'm just hoping that it is and painting you with this coat and pretending to like you! Gosh this is so confusing is it supposed to be hard! The funny thing is while writing this sentence I'm thinking DUUUDE I DONT GIVE A SHIT! I just wnna give it a shot, a chance .... God damn it. I'm falling for you and you don't even know it

Lots a' love

47 xoxo

P.S: I hope I'm not making a fool out of myself!